Tip of the week - Get your groom involved

He asked, you said yes.  You're engaged and getting ready to start planning the wedding of your dreams, and, traditionally, the bride has done most of the planning, but you'd really like your fiancee to be involved.  Here are some simple ideas on how to get him involved, keep him involved, and enjoy the time you will get to spend together while planning for your celebration.




1. Have dinner or lunch together, regularly, to discuss wedding plans.  Have a lot of one-on-one discussions with your notes, pictures and thoughts all readily available.

2. He's a guy, so you will have to make the planning fun and boost his self confidence.  Take him to tastings.  How can you go wrong with food and drink?  Go on fun gift registration trips.  Sporting stores (Scheels), outdoor party ideas, items needed for fun entertaining are all decisions that he'd most likely want to be involved in.  And, always make sure to compliment him on his creativity and ideas.

3. On one of the first one-on-one discussions you have, ask him what he would like to be in charge of. Even though you would still like input on these decisions, you can let him take charge of these things.
Some fun ones for the guys are:

• drink selections
• writing his vows
• music for the reception
• cake flavors
• tuxedo or suit options 
• wedding day transportation
• planning the honeymoon
• make room blocks for out-of-town guests at local hotels

4. Delegate simple tasks to your fiancee.  He can run over to pick up the invitations.  He will have to check them over to make sure everything is correct, so this is a great thing for him to do to make sure he is involved.  He can also work with you to call all of your vendors the week before your wedding to verify all important information.  Give him half of the list and the date that this should be done by.  When this is done, have some dinner and verify everything with each other.

5. AVOID fighting over wedding planning and wedding budgets. Finances is the number one topic married couples fight over. Start your marriage on the healthy path by having loving, mature, productive discussions about your wedding finances.  To make sure you don't have finance issues before you're even married, make a budget for your wedding and stick to it.  Make the budget one of those one-on-one discussions...you'll be happy you did!

6. Please don't be a BRIDEZILLA!  Your groom will give up on trying to help, and neither of you will be happy.  A BRIDEZILLA is defined by the following behaviors:

• controlling behavior
• irritability
• yelling
• making all of the decisions
• hard to please
• being critical of the groom and everyone else that is trying to help 

Planning your wedding together should be a fun and creative way for the two of you to start your new life together.  This is a great time to learn how to work together.  Planning a wedding is stressful and time-consuming, but if you work together, make sure to communicate, don't sweat the small stuff and have fun with each other, you are off to a great start.

Tip of the week - Wedding Registries

No matter what the style of your wedding is or what your budget and your friends and families budgets are, people will buy you gifts for your wedding.  They want to get you something you really want and need, so please do your wedding registry. 

This is a shopping trip that would be fun for both you and your fiancee.  This is the beginning of your new life together and it's great to have the things you'll need once you get back from your honeymoon.  Sure, you can register for china, silver and crystal, but while you're out with your hubby-to-be, go to the sporting store and register for those snowshoes or tennis racquets that you both wanted.  Or the hockey gear for him and the sweet roller blades for you.  You will also want to register for the everyday things.  Cookware, silverware, cool wine glasses, appliances, cutlery, sheets and towels fall into this category.  Everyone will want to know your colors of choice and sizes and this way, you will only get one toaster - not 5!

Make sure to register at least 5 - 8 months before your wedding.  This should be enough time for your friends and family to know what to look for by the time any showers and parties arrive.  Most companies will keep your registry for up to one year after the wedding date. 

Also, some places offer a professional bridal registry consultant.  This would be a good idea if you're not sure what you need.  They have the knowledge of the products to help you with your choices.  If you decide that you would like to work with a bridal registry consultant, call around.  Make sure that, wherever you go, your guests will be treated well, make sure the list, and the items on it, are easily obtainable, and the prices, selections and quality are acceptable.

Then, when this is all done, have some delicious dinner and a glass - or two - of wine and sleep well!